11 years

Today has been 11 years since my mom passed away. It is a VERY hard day for me. I always remember that this was the day that I last heard my mom tell me that she loved me. It is hard to think that I have been without her for so long or even harder that I still have the rest of my life to go without her. She was a wonderful, loyal, beautiful person. I have so many wonderful memories of her, and I am so thankful for each of them. In our last conversation, she told me that she was ready to go home. I know that she was talking about going home to Enterprise, but God saw it fit for her to go to her eternal home. I know that she is healthy, happy, and wouldn't come back even if God gave her the chance. I know that when we get to heaven there will be no comparing life on this earth to spending eternity with Christ. I don't begrudge that for her, not one minute, but for my own selfish reason I really wish we had just one more day together. I wish that I could ask her questions, like parenting advice, marriage advice, etc. I wish that I could hug her one more time and tell her that I love her. I know that she knew I loved her, I just wish I could tell her again. I wish she could see my children and my husband. I wish that she could see that all her prayers for me were not in vain. She had the most amazing laugh, I can hear it now. In church today we sang Amazing Grace and I could hear her singing, she had a beautiful voice! In this life she was very musically inclined and loved to sing/play the piano to God. I wish I had some of that talent!! I have a lot of "I wish" in this post. Sorry about that. I am not angry at God for taking her, I am glad that she is not in pain anymore. I still miss her though. However, above all else, I know without a shadow of a doubt that I will see her again! I am looking forward to the day when we can praise our Savior together, until then...I love you mom!